Category Archives: changes

crying

Growing up I thought crying was a bad thing, because it indicated grief or hurt. And it usually does. And for most of my life it usually was the reason to cry.

I also thought crying was for babies. Did I cry much as a teenager? I don’t remember, but I do remember being angsty and frustrated. If I knew why I was so angsty and frustrated I think I would have cried. Because it usually was because of a grief or hurt.

Now I’ve learned that crying isn’t always a bad thing. Crying can be a healing force, a release of the grief and pain, not an indicator of carrying pain. Crying can be the balm to finally close up that wound that time didn’t heal. Crying can be a sign of maturity.

Context is always the key for anything, including crying. When you’re young you may not understand context, but as an adult the hope is to grow emotionally and understand context properly.

On a related note, I recently read the script for this old classic movie, Kramer Vs. Kramer. While reading it I wanted to cry at certain scenes, and I bet if I watched the movie I would cry a lot.

the fall

This week the weather was summery, with highs in the 80s. It’s already September. On Monday I was thinking how long until the weather changed and then the next day the highs were in the 70s. The weather has changed. The kind of change where in LA you can wear shorts or not. Wear a hoodie in the evening. Perhaps skip the flip-flops for socks and shoes. Et cetera.

For me, I’m wearing the shorts, tanks, and flip-flops as long as I can.

I also did some “fall cleaning” of my phone. I have years of photos and videos and backed them up to my computer and then deleted about half off the phone. I suddenly have many gigabytes to take more photos and videos without worrying about running out of storage or having the phone freeze up when there’s not enough free space. I felt cleaned, pruned, detoxed, indexed.

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Don’t forget that there are families who could still use some help, post-hurricane. Take a look at this post and donate. It will go toward helping them rebuild their lives.

 

Help these Hurricane Harvey families rebuild!

I’ve added more families who have lost homes, cars, and belongings from Hurricane Harvey. The amount of devastation is unbelievable. These are families I know personally or are friends of my friends. All real people, families with children and/or pets or single parents or single people. So many have lost everything.

You lose a lot in a flood, even when you put what you can upstairs (if you have a second floor): shoes, clothing, photos, rugs, furniture, cabinets, carpets, flooring, appliances, cars or trucks, etc. You name it, it probably got stinky sewage-contaminated flood water in it. If the item can’t be bleached, it’s gotta be tossed.

If you can donate even $5, which is the price of one Starbucks or one cheap meal, it will help entire families get back on their feet and have a normal life again. Five bucks doesn’t go a long way by itself, but a bunch of people giving five bucks will go a very long way.

1. This is Maria, who has four children with her husband. They lost everything. Maria’s relatives all live on the same street, and they lost everything too. Help them get back on their feet.

https://www.youcaring.com/mariagomez-934201

2. This is Jessica and David, who have three kids and three dogs. They didn’t lose everything because they had a two-story home, but they lost a lot, including David’s carpentry workshop. So their income is greatly affected due to the workshop damage. They also lost both of their cars due to flooding. Help all of them by donating here.

https://www.gofundme.com/hurricane-harvey-help-vass-family

3. This is Heari’s family. She takes care of her special needs brother and her diabetic father. They lost everything. And as a working schoolteacher and head of household, she needs your help. You can donate here.

https://www.youcaring.com/hearikam-934129

4. Jacob’s apartment was flooded with six feet of water. He doesn’t even know if he can go back to his place yet to salvage anything. He basically has to buy everything again and start from scratch. He may also have to relocate. Help him out here:

https://www.gofundme.com/rebuild-jacobs-home

5. The Chan’s house was flooded and they have already begun the repairs, but this single mom and daughter need help in the long run to pay for all the repair expenses. It’s not cheap and it would be nice to have walls again and to have furnishings again. All that stuff piled outside is flood damaged and has to be tossed. All that trash used to be their belongings less than two weeks ago. Donate to their fund here:

https://www.gofundme.com/hurricane-support-for-nan-narissa

6. This young couple has nothing left but their dogs, a few shirts, some jewelry, and a few photos. Everything else is gone. Can you imagine having no clothes, no car, no computer, no your-favorite-thing, no kitchen, no anything except these few items? I can’t either! Help them get some sense of normalcy back:

https://www.youcaring.com/sebastianornsteinandkristinnaidysh-930881

7. And I have a friend in a northern suburb of Houston called Kingwood working directly with families for support. 100% of your donation will be used to directly help families. You can send PayPal donations to Cleaneatingmom1@gmail.com  

 

love and peace or else

I remember a line that Bono sings/says during a song or maybe it was in a book; it may not be his words but he says them and I remember them. Something along the lines of “don’t become a monster in order to defeat the monster.”

We really need to not become monsters to defeat the monster of racism.

gratitude

Recently I’ve been in a bad mood, being crabby, grouchy, whiny, pouty, sullen. It’s not an unfamiliar place, but I don’t like being in that place as much as I used to. Mostly because I’ve experienced joy and happiness and I like those feelings more, even if those feelings don’t always last as long as the others.

A friend who is quite busy these days took a few minutes to tell me about gratitude. Gratitude does change things. It changes your focus from the few bad things to the many good things. And even if it’s more bad than good, focusing on the good keeps your mind from the gutter and thinking the worst, when the worst hasn’t happened or may not happen at all. It’s entirely possible that the very best could happen.

The situation doesn’t change, but the perspective and mindset changes. And if you think, therefore you are.

hole-y denim

A trend in denim jeans is having holes in them. Depending on your age, you may immediately think of the 80s-90s where holes in jeans were cool, just like big hair.

I never got into the trend of holes in jeans unless it was made naturally through normal wear and tear. Plus they cost more to have someone to cut the holes in fashionably appropriate places. So that’s a hard pass for me.

Until…I went to a clothing swap.

I was looking for some new-to-me jeans and wasn’t having much luck on finding anything that seemed remotely like my style. Towards the end of the swap I was willing to look again at the denim piles and saw these 1969 Gap jeans in really good condition. As I turned the pair around, I saw the holes and thought it was a so-close-but-no-cigar pair. But, as I said, it was toward the end of the swap and I needed to find new jeans. So I just took them home without trying them on.

I put them on and found they fit perfectly. The holes were kind of annoying and I figured I would wear them casually, in the level of formality above joggers and below jeans with no ripped anything.

But they were so comfortable and the right shade of blue that I ended up wearing them often. What made the jeans truly mine is when I got compliments on the jeans, for the holes. Suddenly, I was cool. And I’ll take that anytime. No need to reject a compliment on being fashionable.

So now I am trendy with ripped jeans. I never would have bought them in a store, and I probably never will. In that sense I am still me and that will never change.

Joggers and ripped jeans. Who am I becoming?

charity: water

Today I checked on my fundraising campaign for charity: water. What a surprise I found! My goal of raising $450 was met yesterday! It really stumped me, yet why was I stumped? Why did I start the campaign if I felt as if it could not be done? Perhaps I wanted to see what could be done. My expectations were not high enough, but I’m glad that they were exceeded!

I’ve never campaigned for any sort of cause before, even though the issue of clean water has always caught my attention. This year, for my birthday, I wanted to take action, and it’s amazing how one small decision is going to impact a community somewhere that doesn’t have access to clean water! It has a global impact!

While in every way I am amazed by my friends who have donated (some of whom I haven’t seen in years), I am becoming aware of the impact of one. And that I can impact the world in a real, practical way to total strangers! It’s empowering, revelatory, and slightly terrifying.

How much more can I change the world in a positive way? There is so much negativity, stupid arguments, and endless distractions in our lives. It is time for me to stop procrastinating, dawdling about, and only wish for change when I can actually do something to bring about change.

This week I’ve started to flesh out a story synopsis that I wrote a couple years ago. I hope to make it into a short serial e-book for Amazon Kindle. It’s not easy to write, but I know I must write it and see what can happen. I have been wonderfully surprised today; how much more excitement is out there?